Browsing Tag

wild soul

Lineage, Wild Woman

My Wild Grandmothers

February 2, 2014

The breaking of the bond between a woman and her wildish nature is often misunderstood as the intuition itself being broken.  This is not the fact.  It is not intuition which is broken, but rather the matrilineal blessing on intuition, the handing down of intuitive reliance between a woman and all females of her lines who have gone before her – it is that long river of women that has been dammed. ~ Clarissa Pinkola Estes  

mama lion meghan genge

Lineage. Matrilineal lines. Ancestors. Those words have been finding me a lot lately. I admit that I haven’t been paying attention to their call.

Then I read this quote this morning on Ronna Detrick’s site and looked it up in my own battered copy of Women Who Run with the Wolves. Sure enough, I had underlined it. The colour of the line tells me that it first attracted me back in 2003.

I missed my Great Grandmothers even then.

I’m lucky. My relationship with my Mom and my Grandmothers is and was very good. But it occurs to me as I write this, that they never really told me stories about their Grandmothers. I have heard a few, but it doesn’t take very long even for my Oma – who, though in her 90s still remembers everything – to run out of stories about the women who came before. My Mother’s family immigrated to Canada when she was three. She never knew her Grandmothers, so neither do I. Their stories were not passed on.

But I know it goes deeper than that. There is a reason that women’s stories stopped being told.

This post and I have spent several hours together as I waited for inspiration on how to end it. I wanted some great stroke of insight that would tell me where to go next, but the truth is that I don’t know. Part of me wants to simply hit delete. But there is a knowing deep in my core that is telling me to sit with these questions. To put them down and sit with them and then listen for the next steps.

And so I will.

xo

 

 

 

 

 

emotions, gratitude, The Seeker

Expectations Managed.

November 13, 2013

“Just reach for the stars if it feels right.” – Maroon 5 Moves Like Jagger

Expecting a Unicorn meghan genge

All of my life people have been managing my expectations. My parents had to, bless them. My family helped me believe in magic, so I was a little girl who wanted the moon and was very VERY unhappy when she didn’t get it. I had lists. Lists of how things were going to go, how I wanted them to go and what I needed to do or pack or accomplish to get there.

I still make lists.

At school, the teachers didn’t know what to do with the girl who believed in magic. I wanted to be the lead in every play. I wanted to get gold stars and best-in-classes. It wasn’t because that was necessarily the smart thing to do, but because those things were the best possible outcome.

Magic.

So they managed my expectations. Frankly, I still needed a little managing then. A little.

But the problem is that at 39, people are continuing to attempt to manage my expectations. People who have no business in my business.

Why?

Why is it wrong to want the magical? The mystical? The delightful? The perfect? The divine?

Which would you rather: a) expect the ordinary and be happy when you get it or b) expect magic and miracles and be happy when something wonderful happens? (P.S. You are big enough now to deal with whatever happens.)

“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land amongst the stars.” Brian Littrell said that. But Brian, with all due respect, I disagree. I have operated on managed expectations for 39 years now and I have to say, it’s not enough for me.

I expect magic. I expect miracles. I don’t want to shoot for the moon anymore. It’s “second star to the right and straight on ’til morning” for me.

And to everyone who wants me to be practical or rational or who wants to explain to me why I shouldn’t want more?

Thank you for caring so much. But from now on my expectations will be managed by me.

I love you.

But I’ve got this.

 

x

 

Stories

Wings – A Story

November 13, 2012

“We fear to trust our wings. We plume and feather them, but dare not throw our weight upon them. We cling too often to the perch.” ― Charles Newcomb Baxter

I was all set to record another story this week and I have come down with a cold that has completely taken my voice away.  (What is the lesson there?)  So tonight I have decided to give you my very first story.  Written when I had finally decided that stories were the way I wanted to take my website, but before I realized that I wanted to record them, it is short and sweet.

I hope you enjoy it.

xo

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120 Audio Link

Wings by Meghan Genge [2:42]

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