fire

Just Show Up

August 2, 2017

“When you imagine your future, do not think that you will be the same then as you are now.” – Sanaya Roman

I started writing this yesterday, and wanted to wish you a very happy beginning of August, but there were men here working on our rental house and it was so loud, I couldn’t even think. So I popped my earphones in, listened to some music, and got sucked into looking back through my blog.

vision board full 2010

(My Vision Board from January 2010.)

It started off with me copying and pasting some of the quotes I have used in the past, but then I just started to scroll backwards, reading three posts at a time, until I had reached page 75 and a post I wrote in 2009 about the strangeness of memory.

I remember all of it. I remember taking every picture and where I wrote each post. I remember learning how to upload the chapters of my book. I remember how I felt, how I yearned and searched and wanted and dreamed. I remember how lost I felt and how worried I was that I was never ever going to ‘get it together’. I remember the people who used to comment on every post, and I wonder where some of them are now. When I follow the links back to their old blogs, most are long gone.

It was a strange feeling, watching Future Self me reading back over letters from Past Self me; a me that feels so far away and yet so present. I am still her in so many ways. Her questions, her dreams, her proclamations, her wishes and her hopes are all still a part of me. I am so proud of her, so in awe of her, so grateful to her for showing up and writing what was in her heart, and for always asking for more.

Earlier this week I wrote a post about just showing up, and so I have been spending time at the page every morning. As I wrote this morning, I thought a lot about about mySelf and all of the things that I have been wanting and dreaming about for years, and where I am compared to where I thought I would be by now.   I know now that all of the good things that happened in my life happened because I showed up. And I don’t mean rocked-up-to-the-party-once-and-went-home, I mean when I knew something was right, so I showed up up over and over again, even when I didn’t feel like it. Even when it was hard. Even when all I wanted to do was go to bed.

vision board meghan genge 2010

(Detail from my Vision Board – January 2010. P.S. I own those glasses!)

And that is a big shift for me. My natural inclination is to stretch towards freedom, but rules and structures make me want to run screaming into the night. Sitting here looking through the eyes of my past self, there are so many more things I wish that she had showed up for.

But here’s the Magical bit: now I know. Now I know that in a few years I will be sitting somewhere looking back at this letter. Now I know that that me will want so much to tell this me to just show up.

It’s not about weight.
It’s not about money.
It’s not about love.
It’s not about health.
It’s not about anything.
It’s about tending the fire:
My Fire.
It’s about showing up, over and over and over again.
The way my future self would want me to.
And making her happen.

fire

Returning to the Fire

September 1, 2015

I am a writer, a seeker and a finder of magic.

My writing is about seeking truth through story.

What do I mean by that? I mean that no matter how many times you tell someone the cold hard facts, if they have no emotional connection to what you are saying there will be no impact.

We used to learn by listening to stories told by people who had our best interest at heart. In the modern, western world the media has replaced those trusted parents, friends, grandparents and elders.

The screen has replaced the fire as the centre of our lives.

And what story is modern media telling us? Sometimes the message is good, but largely the undercurrent is one of fear. Grounded, centered, happy people don’t spend money. The stories told by our screens today keep us stuck in the mud of comparison, of not-good-enough and of want.

But just telling the old stories isn’t enough. What relevance is a story from hundreds of years ago to a woman trapped in a cycle of binge eating? How can reading the tales of ancestors long dead give someone the answers they are looking for when they lose their job? The answer is that the truth at the center of those old stories is universal and timeless. All we need is to have them spun differently so that they feel relevant today.

My work in the world is to bring women back to the fire: back to the sacred truthful centre of their lives. My mission is to inspire you to find that sacred flame within yourself.

Robert Fulghum wrote:

I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge. That myth is more potent than history. That dreams are more powerful than facts. That hope always triumphs over experience. That laughter is the only cure for grief. And I believe that love is stronger than death.

…and I believe that a good story has the power to change this world.

Heart & Hearth, sacred

Heart and Hearth

October 24, 2014

Groups run by women are our psychic turf; our place to discover who we are, or who we could become, as whole independent beings. Somewhere in our lives, each of us needs a free place. A little psychic territory. Do you have yours? – Gloria Steinem ~ Outrageous Acts and Everyday Rebellions

This year has taught me about the true power of intention. Not – ‘I want a red bicycle’ from The Secret – intention, but pure ‘this is how I want to feel’ intention.

A little over a year ago, I stood beside the fire at our first Redfox retreat. I had spent the days before marvelling at how much of our intention that the retreat be nourishing and nurturing had come true. I also knew as deep in my bones as knowing goes, that I was where I was supposed to be. Retreats. Women’s circles. Gatherings. My soul was singing to me as clear as could be.

But then I got scared. Really scared. Sometimes when you see the power of an intention coming true – when you prove to yourself that magic is real – then the safest thing to do is run as fast as you can back to your smallness. My Big Dream was way too big and scary for me to believe in.

But as I stood beside the fire and watched the faces of the other women, I stepped forward and called in movement. I called in deep, real change. (More on the outcome of that next week!) And I felt a shock of energy hit me. The power of real, honest intention held by a circle of women was actually electric. I remember looking across the circle of light and catching Sas‘ eye and feeling so rooted in the magic of intention and friendship, I wished every women could know – as I knew in that moment – that they are more powerful than they can possibly imagine.

But it all started with intention and a circle of women.

So a few weeks ago when Sas and I were talking late one night about dreams and the sacred and magic, we conjured another circle. We wanted more women to feel what we felt as we circled together. We wanted to bring together some of the most heart-full women we could be brave enough to ask, and have them join us by the fire. We wanted to bring light and peace to the time before the holidays. We wanted to give women a series of precious gifts that they could open again and again, whenever they needed to – with absolutely nothing to do in return. We wanted to bring the sacred back to a time when pulling off the perfect Christmas seems to be more important than the return of the light.

And with that intention, Heart and Hearth was born. And amazing women from all over the world said yes, they would love to participate. And incredible women all over the world are signing up to join us. I hope you will too.

250hhbadge

Older Posts

Just Show Up

Returning to the Fire

I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge. That myth is more potent than history. That dreams are more powerful than facts. That hope always triumphs over experience. That laughter is the only cure for grief. And I believe that love is stronger than death.

Heart and Hearth

Groups run by women are our psychic turf; our place to discover who we are, or who we could become, as whole independent beings. Somewhere in our lives, each of us needs a free place. A little psychic territory. Do you have yours? – Gloria Steinem ~ Outrageous Acts and Everyday Rebellions

Newsletter

New here?

Legal Stuff

My Instagram