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Leap and the net will appear

Costa Rica, Leap and the net will appear

New rule: when you see a pile of poo in the house, find out who did it.

March 30, 2015

be easy. take your time. you are coming home to yourself. – nayyirah waheed


showerWe have spent the last hour flipping between trying to find the ant colony in our bedroom wall and ‘encouraging’ a 7″ Wandering Gecko to go back outside. When I say we, I mostly mean not me. My assistance in the matter involved finding splattered poo on the floor, calling my husband to discuss what it was, seeing the gecko, screeching, and leaping back about five feet, scaring my husband so much that there was nearly more poo on the kitchen floor.

So far, so good.

When people talk about Costa Rica, they usually warn you about the roads or tell you how nice the people are. In the five days we’ve been here we’ve discovered that both of those things are true. What people don’t tell you is that you are now a very small part of a very large ecosystem. I came for the whales and the blue morpho butterflies, but my quality time is being spent with the birds and the bugs and the amphibians.

My husband – The Brit – keeps asking me if I am okay. The third question (after two about the screech and the pile of poo) he asked after he encouraged the gecko out was whether it had put me off of Costa Rica.

The thing about emigrating is that you have to re-learn everything. There is no more old normal. You enter this weird grey area between tourist and local that never entirely goes away, no matter how long you are there. When I moved to England for the first time, I at least spoke the language and had the right clothes. Here it is like stepping into a movie – with bugs – or a strange vacation that never ends. The learning curve is going to be pretty steep.

And so we are adjusting to our new normal. Our first new rule was always check under the toilet seat before you sit down. Other things we have learned already include: don’t leave a light on unless you want ‘company’, coffee tastes best when you are on the deck watching the rainforest come to life in the morning, the locals are as nice as people say they are, buy earplugs, and if you see a pile of poo – try to figure out who made it.

Eventually maybe meeting the neighbours will be so normal it won’t be accompanied my my screeching.




Alignment, emerge, Leap and the net will appear


March 22, 2015

No one has escaped this process of shake down and shake up. If your life is still essentially the same now as it was three years ago I suspect that you have been in a cryogenic deep freeze. Or perhaps you’ve been vacationing on another planet.Chris Zydel


fire move megThe past few days have apparently hosted a huge planetary dance: the end of something which began in 2012, the end of a 19-year cycle and the beginning of another.

No one can ever tell me ever again that the planets don’t have an effect on me.

“Make a powerful intention” the astrologers were saying as I handed in my notice and we decided to move to a different country.

“Let go”, the astrologers were saying as we sold/ gave away/ burned/ packed our belongings; reducing our ownership to the contents of a 5 x 5 x 7 foot crate.

“Everything is about to change” they said as I sat in my parents’ house, homeless, jobless, and in the space between one life and another.

They also say that on the new moon and the equinox, it is important to make a statement of intention – to put the coordinates into the GPS before you set off on a new month.

“The endings we face now, be they losses, disappointments or liberating closure, remind us of the need for deep and abiding alignment with the god-force from here on in, as it threads its way through our lives. – Sarah Varcas via Mystic Mama

These past few years and the past few months I have received proof again and again and again that there is more going on than I know. The support and the nudges and the help we’ve had as we’ve navigated these waters have been illuminating.

When you get a holy yes and you go with it, things won’t always be easy, but magic will happen.

So my intention on this day, as I sit on the edge of a new turn of the zodiac, a new 19 year cycle, a new lunar cycle and a new adventure?


I intend to follow the nudges, the holy yes, the god-force in my life. To believe in the magic of the total unknown, and to have faith in those decisions.

Because going with the magic is so much better than believing it isn’t there.




There is still time to join us!

Do you want to be part of a warm and open-hearted community of women, gathered around a virtual hearth fire? Would you like to join those women for discussion about spirituality, questions, self-care and magic?

Do you crave open, honest conversation about spirituality?

Then we would love it if you would join Sas Petherick and I for Heart and Hearth.

Costa Rica, Leap and the net will appear, The Move

On Stuff

January 13, 2015

Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything. – George Bernard Shaw


IMG_2616Yesterday my husband found me sitting on the floor of our office debating the future of a pile of alphabet magnets. A pile of alphabet magnets that I had not seen in 6 years. A pile of alphabet magnets I had forgotten I had.

For one brief moment of madness, I was debating packing them.

Two contradictory things happen when you commit to getting rid of almost everything and starting again: you come face-to-face with your former selves and you have to pack for a self you don’t know yet.

As I pack these boxes, it is my former self that I am discarding. The things that in other circumstances I might have kept for another 10, 20, 30 years, are now going into charity boxes or finding new homes via ebay. And with every pass through a room or across a shelf, something else feels less important. Something that a month ago was definitely coming, goes into a pile, not making the cut-off criteria of: do I love it enough to ship it? Does it match who I want to be?

I won’t be unpacking these boxes. My future self will be. The self that opens these boxes will be one that is no longer wrapped up in the tying up of a great big job. She will have nearly a year of living without this stuff under her belt. She will have committed to a place. Will my future self be grateful for the things collected in her previous life? Will she even recognise them? Or will she wonder what the hell I was thinking putting these things in a box and shipping them across the world?

And how do I make those choices for her?

The ironic thing is that we thought we had made a decision to change our lives. What we have found is that there is no single decision that changes your life. A change like this – just like real life – is made up of thousands of small, seemingly insignificant decisions. And in the end, you can only get there by making one decision at a time, doing the best you can, and knowing your future self will understand.

At least I hope she will.

Because the alphabet magnets aren’t coming.




Do you want to be part of a warm and open-hearted community of women, gathered around a virtual hearth fire? Would you like to join those women for discussion about spirituality, questions, self-care and magic?

Do you crave open, honest conversation about spirituality?

Then we would love it if you would join Sas Petherick and I for Heart and Hearth.