The one where I quit my job, buy a ticket, and turn 40.

Oct 27, 2014 by

“Imagine a new story for your life and start living it.” – Paulo Coehlo


FlightsConfirmedTwo weeks ago I quit my job. Two days ago I turned 40. Yesterday we bought two tickets to Costa Rica. We leave in March.

Two years ago we were both really struggling. We were struggling with the fact that we both feel like aliens most of the time. We were struggling with the fact that life does not give any guarantees on length, and that the happiest we feel is when we are exploring somewhere together, but we only get to do that for a few weeks a year. We were struggling with the fact that those few weeks off limits the time we can spend with the people we love. We were struggling with the fact that – on paper – we have a nearly perfect life, but we both felt like it wasn’t our life.

One day I hit maximum capacity, and for me, the only cure for that is a walk in the woods. I took my troubles to the trees and had what I have started calling a ‘Come to Jesus’ meeting. I walked and talked – out loud – to God, the trees, the angels, my guides, my ancestors, anyone, really, who might be there and able to help. The land I was walking on is the land where my Grandmother was born (more on that another time) and it takes about an hour to walk its longest trail. So I walked and I talked, and eventually the conversation became calmer and more focused. I went from desperate gulping words to a kind-of feeling/breathing. It all boiled down to one thing: I needed help. Any help.

I didn’t get an answer, but I came home feeling peaceful and connected.

Ten minutes later I sat in our office, talking with my husband about what we could do. He laughingly said, “Just look up retreats for sale in the Caribbean.”

ha ha.

Turns out God uses Google.

I typed it in and got a whole website. I laughingly read out the names: “Dominican Republic, Barbados, Costa Rica.”

I stopped.

We looked at each other.

I haven’t really looked at any news reports for that day, but I am sure I would find an unidentified seismic blip.

The YES that hit both of us was quiet, calm, but powerful.  The yes that hit both of us, was the hell yes of: of course that is what we are going to do.

And then life happened. His Father died. We talked ourselves out of it. We agreed that it was crazy. We shelved it. We got on with more practical plans. But it never went away.

So last October as I was at the first Redfox retreat, he went to Costa Rica. (Because moving somewhere neither of you have ever been IS crazy… right?)

On the third night of the retreat, on the day before our wedding anniversary, we finally got to talk to each other.

I said that leading retreats and working with inspiring people felt like home.

He said that Costa Rica felt like home.

So there, in a corridor in a manor house in England and a pub in a jungle in Costa Rica, separated by thousands of miles, we both knew.

Another hell yes.

So we’re going.

Bought the tickets yesterday.




Related Posts

Share This

Heart and Hearth

Oct 24, 2014 by

Groups run by women are our psychic turf; our place to discover who we are, or who we could become, as whole  independent beings. Somewhere in our lives, each of us needs a free place. A little psychic territory. Do you have yours? – Gloria Steinem ~ Outrageous Acts and Everyday Rebellions


This year has taught me about the true power of intention. Not – ‘I want a red bicycle’ from The Secret – intention, but pure ‘this is how I want to feel’ intention.

A little over a year ago, I stood beside the fire at our first Redfox retreat. I had spent the days before marvelling at how much of our intention that the retreat be nourishing and nurturing had come true. I also knew as deep in my bones as knowing goes, that I was where I was supposed to be. Retreats. Women’s circles. Gatherings. My soul was singing to me as clear as could be.

But then I got scared. Really scared. Sometimes when you see the power of an intention coming true – when you prove to yourself that magic is real – then the safest thing to do is run as fast as you can back to your smallness. My Big Dream was way too big and scary for me to believe in.

But as I stood beside the fire and watched the faces of the other women, I stepped forward and called in movement. I called in deep, real change. (More on the outcome of that next week!) And I felt a shock of energy hit me. The power of real, honest intention held by a circle of women was actually electric. I remember looking across the circle of light and catching Sas‘ eye and feeling so rooted in the magic of intention and friendship, I wished every women could know – as I knew in that moment – that they are more powerful than they can possibly imagine.

But it all started with intention and a circle of women. 

So a few weeks ago when Sas and I were talking late one night about dreams and the sacred and magic, we conjured another circle. We wanted more women to feel what we felt as we circled together. We wanted to bring together some of the most heart-full women we could be brave enough to ask, and have them join us by the fire. We wanted to bring light and peace to the time before the holidays. We wanted to give women a series of precious gifts that they could open again and again, whenever they needed to – with absolutely nothing to do in return. We wanted to bring the sacred back to a time when pulling off the perfect Christmas seems to be more important than the return of the light.

And with that intention, Heart and Hearth was born. And amazing women from all over the world said yes, they would love to participate. And incredible women all over the world are signing up to join us. I hope you will too.



Related Posts

Share This

Practical Magic

Oct 14, 2014 by

And if you were to ask me | After all that we’ve been through | Still believe in magic? | Yes, I do | Of course I do – Coldplay, Magic



Do you believe in magic?

When I was being interviewed by the sparkling Sas Petherick, she asked me about what I thought about magic. I remember laughing and teasing her about what a big question it was. Some people might not agree, but for me it is one of the biggest questions.

In the movie Willow, the shamanic character says: “Magic is the bloodstream of the universe. Forget all you know, or think you know. All that you require is your intuition.” I must have seen that movie when I was about 15, but that quote has stuck with me ever since.

When I am talking about magic, I am not talking about card tricks and pulling rabbits out of hats. I am talking about the moment, the space in time when you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that there is more at play here than you can possibly comprehend. I am talking about the second that holds the intake of breath – and the sound/spirit you let out – when you experience complete connection.  Magic is the sparkle in your eye when you have glimpsed the numinous, the synchronous, or the mystical.

Magic, for me, is in the moments when we know we are a part of something wondrous.

But if magic isn’t hocus pocus, how do we make it practical? How do we actively participate in it?  In her wonderful book, Making the Gods Work for You, Caroline W. Casey invites us to, “Believe nothing, entertain possibilities.” She says that, “through honouring the invisible, we gain a strategic power: we need never be daunted by the limited logic of the visible again.”

Can I get a hell, yes?

So the answer is: magic requires our active participation. Magic is the dance that happens between us and God, the universe, and everything, but we have to be looking, imagining, cultivating and courting it. We need to use our intuition, follow the nudges, listen to our instincts. What is here and around and within us is so much bigger that we can imagine, and it is so willing to play with us.

We just have to pay attention.

Oh, and we also need to believe.


“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.” – Roald Dahl


Related Posts

Share This

Friday Passage – Clarissa Pinkola Estes, PhD

Oct 10, 2014 by

One of my great loves in this world is language, so I have decided that on a Friday I will share a bit of writing that caught my imagination and stayed with me long after the book was closed.



The exotic locale is not necessary to apprehend her. She is
found in a shard of glass, in a broken curb, in a hurt heart, and
in any soul knowing or unknowing, yet crazy in love with the
mysteries, with the divine spark, the creative fire – and not
quite so in love with mundane and petty challenges only.

Think of her not in the ways you’ve been told/ sold.
Rather, seek her with your own eyes without blinders
and your own heart without shutters.
Look low instead of high.
Look right under your nose.
She comes in many guises and disguises.
Hidden, right out in the open.
And you will know her immediately by her immaculate
and undivided heart for humanity.

- Clarissa Pinkola Estes, PhD, Untie the Strong Woman


Related Posts

Share This

The Importance of an Anti-bacterial Wipe or 10 Ways to Have a Healthy, Happy Trip

Oct 9, 2014 by

Travel brings power and love back into your life. – Rumi


paddington meghan genge


When you become an ex-pat, you learn a few things. One of the biggest things you learn is how to fly places and not get sick. I used to get sick every. single. time I went anywhere. It sucked. The low point was lying in a hammock in Grenada praying – literally praying – that my husband would be able to find cold medicine at the IGA.

Over the 16 years I have been en ex-pat, I have learned or come up with a number of remedies and solutions. I thought I would share them here. If I can save anyone else a snot-filled, or jet-lag clouded holiday of a lifetime, it will be worth it.

(Please note: there are no guarantees in this post, and I am not a Doctor or health professional of any kind. I am just sharing what works for me. If you choose to try these, it’s at your own risk!)


10 Ways to Have a Healthy, Happy Trip

1)  Buy a small package of anti-bacterial wipes. When you first sit down in your airplane (or train, bus, whatever) seat, wipe EVERYTHING you might touch – especially the underside of things – and every inch of the tray, screen, buttons, armrest, window shade, seatbelt, etc. Whenever you go to the loo, also take a wipe and wipe down anything you might touch. Sounds like a pain, since starting this ritual I have not been sick after traveling. Not once.

2) Pre-book your special meal or seats as soon as you can! I always choose aisle seats so i can walk around.

3)  Include eye drops, lip balm, Rescue Remedy or similar, gum or a tiny toothpaste, moisturizer and eye cream in your plastic bag of toiletries. It will make you feel like a whole new woman if you use them all an hour or less before you land. (I used to also always carry a Lotus Wei Elixir of Divine Love or Pure Energy but I can’t get them in the UK. They were brilliant for keeping me clear and centered.)

4)  Buy several packs of Kleenex. Airplane bathrooms always run out and if you get a runny nose, you’ll be glad you have them!

5)  I carry an eye mask, wax earplugs (I have found they muffle the sounds the best) and two (yes, two) neck pillows (one inflatable, one stuffed). It has meant I can always sleep on planes, no matter how the seat works, where in the cabin I am, or when they decide to turn off the lights.

6)  Again, I am not a doctor, so I am not prescribing, but when I get my meal on the plane I take a magnesium, a zinc, and a vitamin c supplement. The reasons for the last two are obvious, but since taking magnesium I rarely get twitchy legs.

7) While we are on the subject of twitchy legs, get up and walk. A lot. Make sure you drink enough water. I feel a lot better afterwards if I don’t have any alcohol, but that is a personal preference.

8)  Pack some healthy snacks that make you feel nourished, buy some fun magazines, a novel that feels like a treat and a bottle of water at the airport. Flying is such a privilege. Try to make the trip feel decadent.

9)  Lots of people swear by Melatonin for a few days before and after a flight. Do your own research and see if it might be for you. (For me it makes my dreams so crazy, it defeats its own purpose and I can’t sleep.)

10)  I absolutely swear by going barefoot in the grass or dirt or sand as soon as you possibly can after I land. It may sound crazy, but I was told once that once you’ve been out of contact for awhile, you need to let the earth find you again. When I spend 15 minutes barefoot outside, my jet lag is so much better than if I don’t (in Canada at Christmas for example!)

That’s my go-to list of happy travels tips. Do you have any to add?



Related Posts

Share This